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January 2020 Archives

Why men pull away, and can they come back

Parenting is a delicate balancing act where there is so much to do and never enough minutes in the day to get it done. These demands can make it hard for parents to get some time together, minus the kids. It also robs mom and dad of “me” time or personal space. Most couples complain about this, but it can lead to some parents pulling away, often from their spouse. Unfortunately, recognizing this behavior and complaining about it may only make it worse.

Borderline personality disorders are hard on families

Sometimes divorces occur because a spouse has a borderline personality disorder (BPD) that makes him or her impossible to live with. Nevertheless, the disorder might be undiagnosed, or they still function well enough to hold a job as well as get joint allocation of decision making and parenting time rights. This means that you not only face the challenge of raising children as a divorced parent but one who has to deal with an unreliable co-parent with a disorder.

January is the most popular month to file for divorce

It’s a tradition to have a New Year’s resolution, but some may be surprised to find that the resolution is filing for divorce. Nonetheless, there have been many studies on the timing of divorces, and January is the most common month to do it. Other supporting data comes from Google (the search topic “divorce” peaks for the year during the week of Jan. 6-12), and even Pinterest (queries for “divorce party” went up 21% from December 2018 to January 2019).

Choose what to fight for in a divorce

One of the hardest parts of getting a divorce is making smart decisions. Smart decisions often start with a couple who is willing to mediate their divorce and find areas of compromise during this process. Sometimes couples will fight over things of little financial value because of sentimental attachment, or, worse, they know the other spouse has an emotional attachment. But even in the most civilized divorce negotiation, there can be times when a spouse has to draw the line about what is acceptable and what is not.

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