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Steps to an amicable divorce

Regardless of whether you saw it coming or were completely blindsided, its is now a fact and your divorce is happening. Spouses will now make a series of decisions that likely have repercussions upon the rest of your life as well as those of your children. The impact will likely even go outside the family to extended family, social circles and your community.

How we navigate the familial, social and personal challenges will not only say a lot about who we are as a person, but it is also opportunity to show who we would like to be.

A roadmap for gracefully navigatingdivorce

The circumstances of each divorce is different, but here are some strategies adapted from a s list for navigating this challenging time and building toward a positive future:

  1. Know what you really want: This is a simple statement, but thinking about this is a chance to find clarity of purpose as well as determining what is important to you. Make a list of what you want and then prioritize it by “need,” “want” and “let it go.” Also consider what your spouse really wants.
  2. It is now a business arrangement: Marriage is a partnership that you are now dissolving while creating a new one. Feelings are important, as is the emotional process you go through, but try not to make decisions based on emotion. Try to resolve issues with grace and dignity.
  3. Understand the financial situation: Look at your credit report, family income, debts, expense and figure how it will work with two homes and other new financial obligations. Do this before discussing issues of maintenance and support. Make sure you open new bank accounts and credit cards with just your name.
  4. Create an empowerment team: Support will come from close friends, family and perhaps a group or therapist. It is also crucial to find a family law attorney that fits your goals for the divorce, whether it involves collaboration, mediation or litigation. It may also be necessary to consult financial experts and others to determine the value marital property and other assets.
  5. This is the beginning of a new chapter: Defend your rights as an individual and a parent to find an equitable agreement. Make sure the arrangements fit the needs of children and the parents and think about the future. Ideally, it should be cause optimism and new opportunities.

Making your goals a reality

Proactively applying these strategies can help make them reality. While the couple will need to resolve a lot of issues themselves, an experienced family law attorney can provide guidance throughout the process, protecting the interests of the client and handling important details.

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