After the hustle of the holiday season and the craziness of multiple family and social events, some couples realize that the time has come to end their relationship. January is a common time for couples to file for divorce as the holidays come to an end and reality sets in. It is so common that in the UK, they refer to January 8 as "Divorce Day."
Some couples are already resigned to divorce but want to give the children one last holiday before breaking the news. Others spend the holidays in conflict and realize that the relationship is not salvageable. Whatever the reason for seeking a divorce, it is important to consider these recommendations:
Evaluate and hire a qualified attorney.
Meet with at least two - if not more - family law attorneys to get a sense for their individual approach to practice and how it fits your circumstances. Hire the one that is able to be honest and straightforward with you and that you trust. A divorce is a highly personal process. You want to be able to rely on your attorney for sound and competent counsel when emotions run high.
Break it to the children together.
It may be challenging to have a united front at this challenging time, but your children will appreciate that you took the time to work together to present this difficult news. They will look to their parents for indications on how this process will go and a positive beginning will bode well for future proceedings and your ability to co-parent.
Take it one day at a time.
Don't try to solve all of the issues in one day. You need time to process information and emotions. Take one day at a time and get help to keep you centered and on track. Everyone in the divorce process just wants to know they will be okay. Find an outlet for your grief, anger and frustration and rely on your friends, family, and professionals to keep you focused on what is most important to you.
Divorce is not an easy process. However, once a decision has been made, a careful plan to move forward can be developed with the help of those who can help you understand what you need to consider.